De finibus bonorum et malorum: Ruth Bates Hits The Mammygate Jackpot

mayorfunkhouserlookingprettygrim… and so our long citywide nightmare is over. The Mammygate scandal, which has been consuming Kansas City for roughly 37 years, and which featured a rotating cast of political personalities, leaked diaries, and laughable incidents, may at long last be concluding. The local media world is abuzz with the news that the City Council has settled in the matter of Professional Litigant Bates v. Professional Crazy Person Squitiro. And the sum is pretty staggering: $550,000. Joke’s on you, Ruth Bates: enjoy your health care surtax!

Just one day before jury selection was to begin, the council approved paying former mayoral aide Ruth Bates to drop all her claims against the city and Mayor Mark Funkhouser.

But the vote was close — 7-3, with 7 votes required. Funkhouser abstained.

“I’m disappointed. I was ready to go to trial,” Funkhouser said outside council chambers after the settlement vote. “And I believe I would have been vindicated.”

When asked how taxpayers might react to such a large settlement amount, Funkhouser said: “I’m not going to discuss it any more than I have.”

Wait, so now you and the Missus are going to keep quiet about all this? Um… maybe that should have been the strategy from the beginning. Of course, Gloria can always make this a fun installment in the diary of Tom Marvolo Riddle.

So is this it? Can we officially close the book on this dark era? With Funkhouser, you can never be too sure that something is actually over. Somehow, he’ll find a way to keep this going. It’s sad, really, when potentially capable leaders are sidelined by a fatal flaw; in this case, that flaw is a blind devotion to a lost cause — which can really ruin pretty much everything.

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Filed under City Government, Funkhouser, In the News, Law, Media

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