Fire-Safe Cigarettes: The Crystal Pepsi Of Lung Cancer?

SmokerCeilingArea smokers whine about bad-tasting death sticks: Fire-safe cigarettes have smokers doing a slow burn

“They’re horrible. I’ve been waking up with headaches, body aches, coughing like I’m hacking up a lung,” said Jamie Bartlett, 21, of Grandview. “I just thought I was getting sick until someone pointed (the fire-safe cigarettes) out to me.”

Ms. Bartlett, if you continue your nasty habit, we can assure you that lung will eventually work its way up through your esophagus.

You know, complaining about the taste of cancer in a tube is sort of like saying, “Hey, the bullet that just went through my entrails was really hot!”

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2 Comments

Filed under Health, In the News

2 responses to “Fire-Safe Cigarettes: The Crystal Pepsi Of Lung Cancer?

  1. Justin

    And whining about a legal product makes you look like a jackass.

  2. Dino

    Tell that to the Pro-Life movement.

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