Michael Gomez Still Waging Lonely War On Laughter In Kansas City

thismanwillnotmakeyoulaughBack in our State o’ The Line days, we racked up many nemeses. Among them was local “comedian” Michael Gomez, whom we regularly accused not only of unfunniness, but of deliberate antifunniness — comedy is the ice cap, i.e., and Gomez is global warming. It’s been some time since we checked in on our old friend, and boy have we missed a lot. Gomez is, unsurprisingly, a key member of Ink‘s “frink” panel, that local body politic that weighs in on crucial issues of our time. I thought it might be wise, in the interest of the Know Thy Enemy doctrine, if we perused a few of his “jokes” from the last few weeks, so that we might band together in solidarity against this antifunny uprising. To that end, and with deepest apologies:

The paper phone book is as irrelevant as the Commodore 64 or a Betamax or as my buddy says, The Kansas City Star. Hell, other than the “Antiques Roadshow,” the last time I saw one was when I nervously looked up Ashley Behlen’s phone number in the third grade…

I don’t know if you heard but apparently in prison Michael Vick found Jesus. And upon finding him he immediately chained him to a tire axle in his back yard and made him fight Buddha. 10-1 odds on the Christ child. Say what you want about him but he gets things done…

If you have the government running your hospitals you’re going to have insurance claims that make Bill Gates tax return look like a connect the dots. If you think a state appointed lawyer doesn’t give a damn wait till you get a state appointed surgeon. He’s going to experiment on you like it was Auschwitz in 1945. You’re going to go in for a hernia operation and come out with gills in the side of your neck and pregnant with a baby rhino…

Good god, man — a Holocaust joke? For shame, sir. As far as we can tell, Mssr. Gomez seems to be deploying the following strategy: 1. Use bluster. 2. Make dated cultural reference. 3. Work in incongruent imagery. 4. Profit?

Wait! You can see Michael live this Saturday at Davey’s Uptown. Tantalizing. Or, you know, you could just eliminate the middle man and follow this guy’s example.


1 Comment

Filed under Entertainment, ink, Media

One response to “Michael Gomez Still Waging Lonely War On Laughter In Kansas City

  1. gd

    bwahahahahaha! I’m glad this guy’s comedy has led to some genuine funny.

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